1. IPA vs English Orthography Rap Battle

    I found this video via estifi and it’s pretty great but I kept expecting that it would turn out to be the background beats to a more epic rap battle of the alphabets. When that didn’t happen, I wrote one. Behold.

    You people wanna write a word  
    You people wanna write a sound
    Well your alphabet’s absurd
    So you people goin’ down! 

    You wanna write interdental fricatives
    In your English orthography
    But you can’t tell voiced from voiceless
    In your ridiculous typography

    Yo, I’m the kinda writing system
    Y’always wished you had in school
    Yo, you’ll never need a spelling bee
    'Cause I don't break no rules

    Yeah ‘cause I’m the IPA
    And all my symbols are unique
    Your Latin alphabet’s so tiny
    I’ve got all of that plus Greek! 

    You still sing your ABCs? 
    Hah, well you won’t get so far
    Yo, my vowels are a trapezoid
    You rip off twinkle little star 

    You put an accent on café?
    And you say that’s diacritic-al?
    I got two types of tone markers
    Well now you’re just dia-pitiful 

    K, I think I’m getting gloat-y
    And you know that’s not my wish
    Imma go play with my ghoti
    Oh wait I mean my FISH

     
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      This is so beautiful I actually stepped outside my room to show my entire family.
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